Blind Date

from Full Awful by Full Awful

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lyrics

Oooh, text you
I tell some lies

Let’s go get some coffee so
I can check your face for
Whiskers of a catfish
Hope your chin ain’t mannish

After that, my place or
Your bed to explore
I won’t look up from my phone
Forgot to wear cologne

I don’t care what you think
I just bought your drink
Probably ditch you in the night
Don’t know why you’re so uptight

I’ll take some of your rambling
If I can get a sampling
I don’t have to see it through
For half a night with you

And I just realized
I forgot your name
Right before you arrived
And right after I came

Oh baby please
Understand
On the other apps
I am banned

I'll go straight through ya
I can be truly a
Piece of work
Condescending jerk

Just let me take you out
I want to ease your doubts
The night can see this through
Me panting and hoverin’ over you

I don’t want you to cry
But I will say goodbye
This might be a three night stand
Till I get bored like I planned

I put the moves on you
Didn't work like I wanted to
Feel like I’m under a hex
You look just like my ex

My charm is so inviting
Until it’s not exciting
I might throw you some shade
It’s a game that I play

You took out your crystal ball
I got up to take a call
Noticed your hands were green
Wondered what that could mean

You asked if I was into you
Was pasta bowl that’s true
You said what was up with that
Then turned me into a cat